Comfort Is the New Sexy

Czech Glass Flower Niobium Earrings, Nickel Free
Sisters, we've been fed a line. It's a message we've been told all our lives. We've been told by word and by action, by people close to us, and by models on the screen. We've even told it to ourselves. So what's the message?

Pain is Beauty. Beauty is Pain. 

I am amazed to hear modern-day renditions of this rather old message. I was reading a blog a few days ago by a woman who was bemoaning the fact that even though she was a self-proclaimed feminist, she still felt driven to get a bikini wax every week. She made it clear that the process was not only painful, but somewhat humiliating. I was annoyed at the blogger, because even though she understood that this didn't go along with her values as a feminist, she still saw it as a necessary part of being beautiful. Honestly, if this practice doesn't amount to self-abuse and/or sexual abuse I don't know what does. And the purpose, I guess, would be to return herself to a pre-pubescent state which is somehow thought to be more desirable than full womanhood? I rant.

But, to be forgiving, being a woman in the modern world is confusing. We are given conflicting messages on every level. These messages mess up our relationship with food, with our bodies, with our life partners. They cause us to know one thing, but do another.

You'd be surprised at how much this relates to jewelry. Some of you right now are out there reading this and scratching at your earlobes, your wrists or your belt buckles, because the jewelry or metal fasteners you're wearing are causing pain. Maybe not a LOT of pain, but enough, and over a long period of time. Maybe the story you tell yourself sounds like this:

Blue Blown Glass Argentium Sterling Silver Earrings
"If I suffer through a rash today, I'll just leave my earrings out for a few days to get back to normal."

"How do I know another pair of earrings won't cause the same problem? Probably everyone is going through what I am and not talking about it." 

"It's just the way I am and there's nothing I can do about it."

"It's not so bad, I just wear earrings once in a while. I hope I can still get them in next time, sometimes I have to jam them through." (more on this in another blog I wrote.) 

"It doesn't really hurt, it just kind of itches. It's really my own fault for scratching at the rash too much."

I know what you're thinking (more or less) because I've been there too. When I was dealing with a nickel allergy rash when I was younger, I told myself various stories to make myself believe that this was only temporary, or wasn't even real.

So, are you falling for the "Beauty is Pain" line? Do you feel like pain is your job to put up with, not a problem to be solved? There is already enough pain in life - the kind you can't avoid. Do you really want this persistent and annoying discomfort to be the background noise of everything else in your life?
Picture Jasper Niobium Earrings

Here's my message about jewelry: Your jewelry should not hurt. It should never cause you pain or discomfort. It should not cause you to itch, bleed, or to even worry. You should be able to wear the jewelry of your choice whenever you want and for as long as you want, without worrying about an oncoming rash. Your earlobes shouldn't tingle, your neck shouldn't itch, your wrist shouldn't hurt. There is no moral victory in wearing the stuff that makes you itch either - the only one who's suffering is you.

Now, take a trip with me, and imagine this into reality: taking care of our bodies should be easy.  Our bodies are beautiful just the way they are, and the people who don't believe that are not worth impressing. It all starts with loving yourself.


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